Climate Zealots Blame Mount Etna - And Your Car!
Taking aim at climate cult hysteria, one volcanic eruption at a time.
Mount Etna erupted again, and naturally, climate zealots took a break from sipping soy lattes to declare it was all your fault. That’s right, your car, Sunday barbie, and your grandmas gas heater apparently pushed the 500,000 year old volcano over the edge. Because clearly, Earth’s molten core now responds to your carbon footprint.
Videos showed tourists running from the volcano while X’s eco-warriors furiously typed, “This is what climate change looks like.” Really, Karen? Etna’s been blowing its top since before your electric car was even a dream in Elon’s sketchbook.
Some are even calling for a ban on volcanoes. Presumably with a UN resolution and a strongly worded change.org petition. Pour concrete in them, they cry! Carbon offsets for magma! It's a cult, just without the catchy robes.
Forget plate tectonics, climate fanatics think a 0.01°C blip turned Etna into Krakatoa 2.0. If that’s science, then I’m the Pope.
So next time Etna erupts, fire up the grill, crank the AC, and tell the climate cult to take their apocalyptic bedtime story and shove it where the lava don’t flow.